Been three weeks into the new year, another three to a whole new semester. Well, not actually, every semester is somewhat linked to one another. Hmm. But yes, a new year, with a whole lot of new friends. When I first came over to Perth, I thought six years of vet school seemed forever. Now that one year's down, five more to go! It certainly hasn't been easy but the many skills in life and lessons learnt throughout the year would have been priceless. It surely takes quite a bit out of one's life for him/her to grow up.
Many a time, it dawned upon me that I'm here by myself, my parents ain't gonna be around. My mom isn't going to be there to wash my clothes over the weekend, my dad won't be there to settle the monthly bills. No one's going to be there to tell you dinner's ready. No one's going to tell you to start studying, no one's going to teach you to manage your money. Basically, it's telling you, you ain't a child anymore; this is the start of adulthood. Even if everything seemed too harsh for you to accept, there don't seem to be another way to go about doing it. We take stride in what we do. We make mistakes, and we learn. We fall and we get up. Everyday is special, the whole learning process of what we term an 'adult' doesn't seem like ending anytime. As part of that process, we learn to accept that things don't always go our way, we learn to handle tricky situations, we learn to accept differences in people, we learn to make wise decisions.
As the saying goes,
By 3 ways we may gain wisdom. -
First by reflection, which is the noblest.
Second by imitation, which is the easiest.
Third by experience, which is the bitterest.
Recently, I learnt sacrifice. The meaning of sacrifice from within, a question that I've found answer to. I never understood how far, as a father, would go for his son. Sacrifice. It's such a big word. Big, big, one.
Now I do, I think I do.
"We reject someone else's sacrifice because we feel bad they are doing it,
by rejecting them, we actually make them feel more pain."
And so..in trying to help dad save some money for my flight back home during winter and summer breaks, I've decided not to go back so often. Seeing him work long hours everyday, and not even letting a Saturday or Sunday off, I feel very bad of the financial burden I've imposed. So I've always think..by saving that $700-$900 for airfare, the money can be put to better use on my brother who needs it more. Despite of me telling dad all these, he said I should go home during the breaks if possible. I do agree with him because I believe spending time with loved ones, cannot be put on hold till another day. But still, I insisted the money can be better spent, and I'd work to gain some income.
However, little did I know, he worked so hard everyday, to earn that extra cash for my flight back home, and to see me. It's so hard to imagine how a father will feel, to want to see his own son, grown up; safe and sound. And so, never did I realised, my act of rejecting him, hurts him even more; that his sacrifices weren't appreciated.
Now I know. I really do.