Monday, December 31, 2007

A new year; with same old colours

It's new year's eve! With 1st Janurary unfolding in 90 minutes' time, I welcome the better new year with some resolutions. haha. Before that I'd like to write down some reflections of 2007.

1)A level results
2)Part-time at NUH and Veterinary clinic
5)Derrick's baby girl

1)A lvl results. It was end of Feb. The day we collect our results couldn't have been more frightening. We all knew it in our heads that it either make it or die. And that's the cruel fact of A levels. WIthout good results you're practically kind of screwed. I can't relieve the excitement on the day now, but I remembered hugging my teacher after getting my results slip. I've proven myself. I can see where I'm heading towards at that point in time. Good job. Done with college, what's next?

2)Work. Wanted to find a job in the zoo but failed on 2 attempts within 2 years. Tried the Animal Hospital at mount peasant road but the places were reserved for veterinary students on attachment. Tried many many many clinics but to no avail. In the end got a job offer from my aunt who works in NUS, a job in NUH. So I ended up signing the 4 months contract faster than I thought, got attached to a doctor and assisted her in gathering raw data for her research. I learnt alot as well, been travelling to many schools and taking blood pressure readings of children from 7-16 years old. These 2 months of my entire life was really shiok. I'm literally free of everything and just happy happy go to work and travel around schools in singapore, acting like big boss directing the kids around. Everything seemed so free and easy. Then sometimes go NUH for a while, meet the doctor then we FO to schools. sounds fun right. haha. Next I was in a vet clinic, at paya lebar. Have to reach at 9am in the morning to clean up the cages and feed every single animal inside. Of course I did it with huishan, she's the old bird there. Been into the surgery room and watched numerous surgeries, and poof. nothing beats seeing everything with your own eyes! awesome.

3)Enlistment. Getting enlisted really changed my whole life. Nothing much to mention but one takeaway would be I really learnt to cherish my loved ones more, more than ever before.

4)KSJ. Been kind of MIA from April till bout July, then returned during my sispec days. Officially back into KSJ action during my arti trainee days. Very busy year again, but with the ultimate reward in FAC. Had much fun during ATC as well. Had a spring cleaning at the end of year and changed the layout of the room totally.

5)Derrick's baby girl. On 30th dec 2007 morning, Raeanne was brought into this world, with much excitement and anxiety from the first-time father. Congratulations and all the very best for the future. =)

Bye 2007. The year has fallen into the book of history.


Chatted with ken a lil and he told me the IN colour for next year will still be green, brown and black. Stunned for a moment, turned around and saw my uniform. Just as he typed it out in msn; very true. argh, never mind bout that.

Talking about resolutions. hmm. Resolutions. For peeps who're still studying, I won't find it surprising if they wants to excel in the exams. For working ones, perhaps a promotion, or to find a better job? For parents would be to see their own children grow up, healthy and happy. For my friends in camp, I guessed it's hoping for the o-r-d date to arrive soon. =x For my brother, he hopes to get more barney toys and watch more bananas in pyjamas on disney channel. For me, I hope I can get my university preparations settled so that I can get this load off my chest. It's been bugging me for quite some time.

It's tough. For buddies who are still "not-attached-yet", I sincerely hope you can fulfil your resolution. fate is in your own hands. you can when you believe. Personally, to be truthful, whenever I think about committing myself to a relationship, I shrunk; I withdraw. I can't be certain, not that I'm gay, but I'm really afraid of hurting the one I love. I don't want a repeat. Yes, I'll walk that path, the path which leads me to my career. But it's a long long way, I'm not even at the starting point. I don't want to commit myself to a relationship before leaving for the starting point. My starting point will be when I stand firm at the gate of Murdoch. It's a challenge to control your emotions, sometimes they will really play with you. They tell you, you're in love. But then you tell yourself you can't let your emotions get in control; you're not suppose to be in love; you can't express your love at all. You must let your eyes close and let any opportunties go; shouldn't even try to grab hold. You keep it all shut in that tiny fist-sized heart, never to let a single bit leak out. You carry on with life, the only consolation is to tell yourself she will definitely appear, at least 5 or 6 years down the road. I don't ask for much, she must share similar passion - we educate the masses and conserve wildlife.

Next up, I'd still be in SJ...and I really want to do my very best for the juniors in year 2008. "I, S883.... CSO(6) Loh Choon Kiat pledge to serve KSJ..." lol. crap oath. I realised KSJ has found her own meaning, a sense of belonging to her. KSJ really evolved, from zero to heroes. Yes, we are champions, nothing less. or rather, you all are champions in my very own eyes. I learnt alot from trainings, having fun with the kids and watching them grow up - through their 4-5 years spent in secondary school. It takes effort and reflections to take away many important lessons. and all these lessons will only make my life richer and more meaningful. We forge many friendships through sweat and tears, sometimes even blood. This I'll find it hard to forget.

Thirdly, I WILL GET GOLD IN IPPT. VERY SOON, I CAN FEEL IT. LOL. 2.4km in 9.44min, HERE I RUN. :):):) (not forgetting additional $100 into my account. hahaha)

Forth, I wish for a safe and successful exercise in South Africa next year, with lotsa happy returns! haha.

Lastly, I wish for health and happiness for all ! nothing beats having a healthy mind and soul right? May we have a smooth-sailing, properous 2008!! 1 more minute!! wee.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007



merry christmas to all! :D

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

A new lease of life

I'm back in blogging! haa. Sorry for being MIA for the past weeks or (months). Recently got to my new unit and realized life in there isn't what I thought to be. Found myself struggling to cope with the unfamiliar environment and getting myself overwhelmed by the immense pressure on my weakened soul.

Didn't had appetite for my first meal - lunch. Couldn't stomach what's on the plate. It just didn't seem right to me. Suddenly I could feel the world's gonna collapse on me after lunch. The future 's full of uncertainty. I couldn't see where I was heading towards; it was as if I am walking into this space of infinity. It's that scary. Tears could just roll.

On the first night I went down a storey to share with my buddy. We both couldn't get to bed. It's kind of tough to fight the lonely night with no one to talk to, just you and yourself, rooming in with many unfamiliar faces and only your new pillow to hug. Uneasy feeling all around, isn't it. No, this isn't homesickness. I know it. I repose under the blanket of stars, the moonlight pierced through my face. As I lie down and watched the moon through the window, how I wished if I've someone beside, someone for me to lend a listening ear, someone to stay for the night. (certainly not those mates in there! :x)

For all I know, it's nearing the hour. The hour to get out of bed and wash up, and prepare for the new day ahead.

'Heaves a heavy sigh' as my feet got out of the blanket and hit the floor.

mmm. alright. enough said. "you can't change the way how you feel, but you can change the way what you want to do about it"

When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. - The line I'll hold on to.